Game of Thrones Review: “The Iron Throne”

Author: Cameron Fairchild

Westerosians…

This was fine. I thought when Daenerys died that scene was like, well done, but fairly problematic cuz a guy killed a girl that the show very deterministically decided was crazy and worth killing. Then Drogon came in and melted the Iron Throne, which was dumb for a lot of reasons, chief among them the dragon would have no knowledge of what the throne looked like or probably even was, let alone that it held special, corrupting influence over his mom. Then after Daenerys died (about halfway through an episode that starts with about 20 minutes of slow, sad walking and nothing else) the Unsullied decided not to follow through on her final order to execute Tyrion, instead letting him stay alive and DECIDE THE FATE OF THE SEVEN KINGDOMS, even though the Unsullied have no reason to do that. Then Bronn became the Master of Coin? Why? What qualifies him to do that other than rank cronyism on Tyrion’s part? How can we decide that Tyrion’s rule under Bran the Broken (Jesus Christ, that moniker) will be any better than anyone else’s? We don’t. Bran is boring, everyone is basically dead so he has nothing to rule (Tyrion reminds us the council has “hungry mouths to feed” – whose? The corpses? They’re all dead, my dude), and Sansa rightfully heads back up North to hypothetically rule the only remaining subjects in the realm.

It really sucks that this show, which has been and will most likely remain a vastly important piece of TV history, has a finale that’s so easy to pick apart for minutiae like this. I’ve never been the biggest fan on Game of Thrones, but I could at least respect its ambition. At the end of season 8, I’m just bored and confused by its rampant lack of internal logic and piss-poor characterization. Even trying to get angry at the finale is exhausting, and all of Twitter kind of did that for me. It’s weird that a week after the episode came out, no one’s talking about it or even seems to care that it happened. Maybe that’s just a symptom of the 25-hour Twitter discourse cycle, but it feels indicative of just how much of a thud GOT landed with. We’ll always have season 2, I guess.

RIP Corner

  • Daenerys Targaryen. Sorry the writers were sh*tty to you.
  • No one else? Really? Okay.
  • Game of Thrones. Rest easy, you big, dumb brute.

Theory Corner

  • Those books better come quick.

CAMERON FAIRCHILD | Would dislike TV less if it didn’t make it so damn easy to hate. “TV is better than movies” people are wrong, and will always be wrong, that’s my last hot take I swear. Someone take my platform away from me. | KXSU Arts Reporter

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